I got this in my email and it really makes me laugh.
This elderly man and elderly spinster met late in life and really liked each other . After a couple of dates they ended up in bed one night. In the morning the man was lying there thinking, 'If I'd known she was still a virgin I would have been a bit more gentle.'
The lady was thinking' If I'd have known he could still do it I'd have taken my tights off.